When I Googled Bullying, I got 20 million responses!!! It is a prevalent topic and a serious one. Most of those initial Google responses were from psychologists and others much more qualified than I to address this topic and possible solutions for it. My only intention here on this page is to call additional attention to the consequences of bullying.
Earlier this week, I read a book called 19 Minutes by Jodi Picoult. Not my usual type of book but it sucked me in for the entire 500+ pages. 19 Minutes dealt with the 19 minutes it took a disgruntled student to wound and kill 19 classmates.
The WHY was the fascinating topic that kept me glued. The shooter was a poor kid who had been relentlessly bullied from day one of his school years. On that first day, two bullies stole his new Superman lunch box and threw it out the bus window. This behavor didn’t stop or slow down for the following 11 years.
School bullying, or bullying at any time, is a very perplexing problem. Looking for help or relief from it only brings more. In the case of the book, this student finally cracked and planned to get even. It is really a problem to think about.
How Can We Stop It?
The definition of bullying is physical or verbal aggression that is repeated over a period and, in contrast to meanness, involves an imbalance of power.
Twenty-eight percent of young people from grades six through 12 have been the victim of bullying. Often the child does not tell the parents what is going on. Some warning signs for parents to look for :
- missing belongings,
- unexplained injuries,
- having a limited number of friends,
- declining grades, or
- being self-destructive.
But one of the first items to come up with the Google Search was Responsible Parenting. It dealt with the issue from both sides. From teaching a child not to be a bully and also how a child should combat a bully. But parenting can only go so far. Parents are aware their child is being bullied only about fifty percent of the time.
Who is the Bully?
How many parents know that their child is The Bully? Often, as in the above book, the Bully is a very popular student, a jock, or a leader. And other classmates, bystanders of bullying, tend to succumb to what they believe is peer pressure to support bullying behavior and fear of becoming the victim.
One report suggested that Bullies are made, not born, and it happens at an early age. They suggest that if the normal aggression of 2-year-olds is not handled with consistency, children will fail to acquire internal restraints against such behavior. Bullying may remain a very durable style of behavior, largely because bullies get what they want—at least at first.
And Girls can be bullies just like boys. With girls, it is a more social hazing type of bullying behavior, but every bit as devastating to the young girl being bullied.
Cyberbullying
With the invention of the cellphone, as the social life of young people has moved onto the internet, so has bullying. Whereas bullying was once largely confined to school, handheld devices afford bullies constant access to their prey. This Cyber harassment can be especially disturbing because it can often be carried out anonymously, Victims may have no idea who the perpetrators are.
Summary
I hope I have managed to bring this topic to your attention. The book I mentioned above brought it to mine. Perhaps it is part of the cause of these school shootings. Certainly, a person who has been subjected to bullying and has access to weapons becomes a threat to the safety of others.